Wherein I Talk Endlessly About My Daughter…

Ada 9-1I’m sitting in my living room right now listening to Peter strum on Adelaide‘s ukulele as they sing together, “I am a mayor, on the mooooooon!”

A few months ago:

Peter: Would you rather go to the moon or mars?
Adelaide: (without hesitation) THE MOON, OF COURSE!
Peter: (surprised at her certainty) What? Why?
Adelaide: Because, I want to curl up in a crater on the moon and sleep.

 

You guys, one of the very coolest things about Adelaide is that she always knows exactly what she wants and what she doesn’t want. She’s independent, confident, and just comfortable with herself, it’s inspiring to our entire family.

I’ve tried. I’ve written, rewritten, and deleted again so many explanations and stories about what a wonderful human she is. Part of me feels silly for trying to share it because no one reading it will ever truly understand. Part of me also knows that her precious intricacies are a sacred part of what it means to truly have a relationship with her and that maybe those secrets aren’t mine to tell of. She loves without limits. There’s passion in her laughter and her tears. She’s an artist from her head to her toes. Her thoughts are fairytales and poems. Every person she meets has endless potential in her mind. To know her is to be valued by her.

beverly-cleary-quotes-squeezeAdelaide has always felt as if she’s found stories written about herself in Beverly Cleary’s character, Ramona Quimby. When I saw this excerpt about squeezing a tube of toothpaste I was reminded of a moment from just this summer. Adelaide, 8 years old, took out a red permanent marker and wrote on the white walls of our living room. Everything in me wanted to be angry. I asked her what she was thinking, “I don’t know! I just really wanted to do it! I wanted to know what the marker felt like touching the wall.” I get it. Sometimes you have to push a boundary to figure things out for yourself.

Maybe next year I’ll tell you all about how much I struggled to feel a maternal bond with my daughter for the first several years of her life. But this year, I wanted the world to know that I couldn’t be more proud to call her mine and that she brings endless sunshine into my world. She is so many wonderful things and I am so grateful to know her and share every day of my life with her.

Happy birthday, Ada-laide! Your 8th year was your best yet, can’t wait to see 9!

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